THE UNIVERSE IS INDIFFERENT

Awfully true statement. A wake up call to rearrange my prejudice and update my fairytale.

A fairytale in where I believed that the clouds do come in with silver lining and there was a subtext in between lines, and where chocolate is good for you. But now, I am finding that only in the books is true magic left. A ticket to escape. A flight from tomorrow.

Where the universe is indifferent, my karma has no meaning. In what shall I believe?

I want to believe so that I could do. Oh, water me so I don’t die! Bade me in affection. So I can let myself trust that there is a Sun, a tomorrow and a love.

I want to claim my humanity so I don’t become a statistic. I want to love right now. Loneliness.

I’m in an emotional straight jacket. Collect me and carry me to bed. And don’t worry, my mind has fucked me over more times than any men should ever know. Now, step away from me, I need shine.

WHAT IS NORMAL?

Mum just finished reading ‘Veronica decides to die’ by Paulo Coelho. The book rises a question of what is normal, so she asked for my opinion. My initial answer was ’Go ask Alice’, but then I started thinking.

Since medicine became commercialised, our emotions became medicalised. A boy shyness became Social phobia. Only in last decade or two you hear people being anxious or depressed. If the child is eccentric or slow, parents assume he/she is dyslectic, when only, child is stupid and lazy. Is naming or putting a label to a feeling gives closer? Is every feeling a symptom?

Coelho rises an inquiry whether a psychiatric patients and geniuses are normal. Or are ’we’ normal? Mozart, Van Gogh, Galileo were looked as social outcasts at the time. A life driven by the passion to answer one question, an obsession over the muse and a life of unfulfilled romantic love sculptured these people. And yet we still believe that there is a thin line between a genius and a mad man. What if we divorce ourselves from everything we know, from every thought told by our parents, school, everything media fed us and look at the world with new eyes, take in the account that those people are actually normal, what world would that make? If the genius and ’mentally ill’ people made the bigger percentage of the population? More fun!

Ok, this was more of a who’s normal. Lets talk of what is normal? Lets take homosexuality as a paradigm here. Thirty years ago this choice of a lifestyle was considered abnormal, against the moral law. Now it is normal and we are accepted to see it that way, against all our better judgement. But why is it not normal? We are told that we are animals and our ultimate purpose is to mate and reproduce. By this, male and female institution is to believed customary. Two individuals of the same sex is abnormal. Love is normal and healthy and uncontrollable. Two individual of the same sex in love is what?

People attracted to the opposite sex having an opinion are now Homophobes. Now more than ever we are open about our likes and dislikes, our passions, love and fantasies, open to experiments. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

Or is this jus the challenge for the human race? Adam and Eve were perfectly happy, living in a harmony in paradise of Garden of Eden, until one day an apple showed up, symboling a challenge. A guy named Jesus was sent on Earth to clean up after those two. But what was it exactly they did,? Why was it so wrong? And if it was such a big No No, why was there an apple in the first place. So Jesus is here, to make it better. What happens to the pure guy? Gets killed. He came and Christianity took off. What would be the worst thing to happen if he didn’t come down? Eve still made Adam eat the fruit and we would all be Muslim. Would that be so unimaginably bad?

A person to be considered normal is expected of to behave ought to a standard, regularity, ordinarily… does this make it really normalitive?

If you believe it, then it must be true, and normal.

What do you think?

DAMN YOU HORMONES!

I like to control things around me, but when biology fails me, I wake up angry at the world and want to kill everyone for no reason what so ever!!!

There's no music on the whole youtube that suits me and doesn't irritate me. Each position I sit in I am either too hot or it's too painful (the lobsters are jealous of my shell). I was reading this blog, and when there was re-blogged posts I got angry! I don't know whether my brain is in a sneezing or coughing mode?!

Its one of those days when you think that the Barbie is an unorganized slut and you are jealous of apples (or any other fruit that is on the table and you keep on staring at it).

The thing that angers me the most is I do not know the way how to stop torturing myself, I refuse to go to sleep and its too early to get drunk!

I am going to indulge myself in a book, a new book, because the descriptive, narrative language of a classic that I am reading is driving me bananas! I could eat a banana too!

Hope you are having a better day and that you are not a woman!

(This post contains the most exclamation marks, score!)

SUMMER LOVE

So, i set down, after two days of lying down due to my disease (it is not sexual transmitted that I got from the pillow, no) only a damn high fever giving my nightmares and keeping me constantly exhausted!

I set down to pay my promise to PavliStyle and yet write another masterpiece for the section Love & S. The theme for my unbelievable, smart and witty article was....wait for it...wait....SUMMER LOVE...tam tam tam! The process started as it always does. The mouse arrow go on Words and opens a new document, you know, the blank one. The blank things make me second guess everything. As every single time when I am about to create something, something wonderful and impressive, I stare at the blank. Let my mind flow, play with the ideas, play with whatever I can find on the table, floor, bad...you know.

I am staring in a blank document, and staring...thinking of summer love, the smells, the tan, the sea, the parties, the half naked boys, the night swimming tipsy, you know...all the magic. When it started raining! RAINING! And I was about to write all this...not the summer rain,but the grey, cold, depressing rain. Basically, I am out of ideas. So, please, if you have ideas, or wishes that I can discuss in my next Love & S article, leave a comment below, or contact me, via Face Book or my e-mail. Thank you my dear campers.

UNBEATABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know I promised Volume II of the Escape Lands, but but this is AMAAAAAAAAAAAAZING!!!!!!!!!!!! Djokovic wins once again! Unbeatable man of 2011! I think this is the part where I would put six or more smile faces, but... AMAAAAAAAAAAZING! :D:D:D:D:D:D:D and here they are! Love you Noleeeee!

THIS IS WHY!

My favourite question in the world is WHY. So, I'll be explaining myself in that retrospective.

The main reason I started this blog is because I have an urge to say something, to show something, to write something all the time, through which I can learn about myself and share.

I've just started a new life, moved out and started living on my own. Throw out of the window the security blanket that once I thought I had and proudly, still, standing on my own. I take everything as a challenge, and this would be the most important and the biggest one yet. Apart form the challenge to survive, I will keep this chronicle up to date, post regularly and be constant for once in my life! That is a promise that I am making to myself and to you guys.

Hope you enjoy it!